Penny’s Journey with Hyperemesis Gravidarum
Penny has bravely shared her story of battling hyperemesis gravidarum (HG). Below, in her own words, Penny recounts her experiences of pregnancy, the physical and emotional toll of HG, and the difficult decisions it forced her to make.
Before I experienced HG myself, I didn’t even know it existed. My first pregnancy was a mix of emotions—excited to be growing a healthy baby but dreading every smell, every meal, even waking up. The sickness was relentless. I couldn’t eat, drink, or do anything normal. It ruined my pregnancy and left me terrified about the idea of future pregnancies.
Sadly, those fears came true. During my second and third pregnancies, the sickness was uncontrollable. I spent so much time in the hospital, hooked up to IV drips for dehydration and malnutrition. Even with anti-sickness medication, I just couldn’t function. What made it even harder was missing out on special moments with my little boy. I knew I couldn’t continue like that.
After much heartbreak, I made the devastating decision to terminate both pregnancies. It wasn’t a choice I took lightly, but I knew it was the only way to be there for my son. Even when I thought I was mentally prepared to handle HG again, it hit me worse than before. I was broken. I knew I was failing him as a mum, and I needed to make a change.
HG didn’t just affect me physically—it completely shattered my mental health. I felt so alone and isolated. People would tell me, “It’ll pass,” or suggest I eat a ginger biscuit, as if that could fix everything. They didn’t understand the severity of HG. At my lowest, I didn’t want to be here anymore. I just wanted to feel better, but nothing worked.
Even after my first pregnancy, those feelings didn’t go away. I felt like I didn’t deserve my beautiful little boy because I had struggled so much to carry him. I didn’t have time to recover before diving into motherhood, and that guilt stayed with me.
The hardest part of HG is the constant feeling of “why?” Why is this happening to me? Why can’t I have a normal pregnancy? Why am I such a poor excuse of a woman that this is happening to me? Those thoughts broke me. I’ve had to accept that I can’t physically take another pregnancy. My little boy keeps asking for a sibling, and it’s heartbreaking to know I can’t give him one.
I want people to understand how serious HG is and how much it impacts every part of your life. I wish I could have more children and be healthy. I wish I could give my son the sibling he dreams of. But HG has taken that from me, and it’s a grief I’ll carry forever.
Thank you to Penny for sharing her story with us. Please reach out to us via the support team if you have been affected by her story.
